RC – Get Out Of My Way
Last round, we wanted you to bring in the consequences of not having an equal start for greater emotional impact. This round, you gave us that. The perspective shift works really well – it’s still the same topic but it’s really fresh. Your vocals are really engaging and we love the edge you are bringing there but they are too soft in the mix. There are some lines (“I’m trying to keep the flame burning”) that we could barely hear. Because we had to work so hard to hear and make sure we caught the lyrics, listening to this wasn’t as effortless as it should have been.
Musically it’s really solid. Lyrically, it kind of loses focus. The verses were strong with good examples of ‘show, don’t tell’ (e.g. the history books). The chorus lyrics were weak; they seemed really vague as though they could apply to a number of things and didn’t really hammer home that it was a school issue. The climax of the song “except nobody’s fast enough/for the one who’s got a gun ” caught us off guard. When you hear the word “Gun”, you automatically start thinking about guns and problems with guns. The line itself distracts the listener from what the song is really about, and that’s not something you want to do in the climax. We do like that you didn’t actually use the word “school” until the last verse. That’s really effective.
Edric Haleen – On The Matter Of Bullying (Part 2)
This is not really a protest song.
Anyway, the production on this is really great as usual. You’re conveying a lot through the piano again. As it dwells and circles around the same discordant cluster, the sense of ruminating over the same thoughts and not being able to move really comes through. A no-holds-barred vocal delivery.
Having said that, for some reason this one didn’t capture us emotionally as the last few of your pieces has. Musically it’s compelling but it didn’t spur us on.
MC Ohm-I – If You Were Gay
Using second person is the most intimate approach you can take in terms of point of view because it brings it invites the audience to step right into the song and take on the circumstances and associated feelings. We loved how you started with “you” – instantly sat up and paid attention and it kept it really fresh. Disappointed, though, that it didn’t carry through the whole song. You use it a few times but for the most part, the verses were just listing things to change. In terms of emotional engagement, it really lost us. It needed to pull more emotionally to be effective.
Once again, however, the production was great and you do a great job crafting your lyrics and singing them with precision!
Ross Durand – Someone’s
Really punchy, nice production, energy, groove. Engaging riffs. The lyrics feel really natural and that chorus is money man. The specific example and images you use (“Will it be some poor kid/Just trying to pay for school”) are within easy reach of the listener because you are drawing on common experiences and connections. That makes it really engaging and it packs more of an emotional punch because of it. We particularly liked “And some keep a gun by their bed/And every once in awhile think about ” in the first verse as well. If anything, we would have loved a little more grit in the vocals, especially the verses. In terms of being a protest song, this one met the challenge best.
The SHADOWS… Were not reviewed
Thanks you guys! You were awesome and we had a lot of fun! Thanks so much for letting us be judges and also for putting up with us!